These are the days when I question how did my life come into disrepair? That I surmise my life was made from my actions that were without reason. Am I adult-like enough to have the wisdom to resurrect a self that has fallen to pieces?

A  wordless funeral tune is my inner song. Only when in a dreamless sleep do I find reprieve from this self I no longer recognize. I do not know when this hole in my heart began to drip away my happiness.

Before becoming disabled by glaucoma, my three brothers. two children and former husband were there to answer the phone or to make a call. Do they not conceive that being visually challenged by definition is a hardship? It is only reasonable for me to ask, that if I cannot drive to you, should you drive to me? Now that I no longer have the funds to purchase gifts as I once did, should you now purchase one for me? When I was strong was I not there for you in your darkest days, so now in my darkest days should you be here for me?

Nonetheless, I feel as though, to you, I have become the less that is now the none.



One thought on “When I Was

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